A Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup (passing by and saw a corpse in the hallway): キャアアアアア！ 死骸！死骸！君の御嬢ちゃん、警察と救急車を呼んっで！ (Kyaaaaaa! Shigai! Shigai! Kimi no ojou-chan, keisatsu to kyuukyuusha wo yonde!) - Kyaaaaaa! A corpse! There’s a dead body ! You girl over there, call the police and the ambulance!
*the girl over there turns around*
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: ええ！早く！ (Ee! Hayaku!) - Yes, you ! Hurry up !
Kaoko: 分-分かった！。。。救急車！ 警察！こちに来い！(Wa-wakatta! …KYUUKYUUSHA!!! KEISATSU!!! Kochi ni koi!) - Go-got it! …AMBULANCE! POLICE! Come over here !
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: ...
*the random old lady with heavy makeup hit the girl over there with a bag *
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: 然う言う意味じゃないわよ！この屎尼！携帯を！ (Sou iu imi na ai wa yo ! Kono kuso ama! Keitai wo!) - I didn’t mean it that way, you damn bitch! Give me your phone !
*the girl over there gives her phone to the random old lady with heavy makeup *
*the random old lady with heavy makeup phoned the police and they came*
Inspector Midori: 死亡したのは? (Shibou shita no wa?) - What is the estimated time of death ?
Officer Takagi: 男が死亡したのは九時三十五分から十時四十分間。(Otoko ga shibou shita no wa kyuu ji san juu go hun kara juu ji yon juppun aida.) - The woman’s time of death was between 09:35 AM and 10:45 AM .
Inspector Midori (turns around to the two major witnesses): So you two were the one who discovered the body. Arai-kun and… Ze Randomu Orudo Reedy Weze Hiavi Meekuappu-san ?
Kaoko: Not me . I am just a girl passing by who happened to be yelled at by a random old lady . She told me to phone the police and the ambulance .
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: You saw a dead body and just ignored it !? What kind of heart do you have ?!
Kaoko: ... It is a pain in the ass so … I didn’t want to be dragged in (laughs ).
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: Inspector! This girl is suspicious !
Inspector Midori: Indeed .
Kaoko: Is it alright with you to accuse me like that (talking to TROLWHM) ?
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: Yes .
Kaoko: Then you don’t mind if I point things about you ?
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: I care less . It’s probably nonsense that doesn’t make sense .
Kaoko: ... You … why did you pass on the job to call the police to me ? Where is your cell phone ?
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: That’s …
Kaoko: Telling from how you dress , you are the kind of person who likes to socialize with people. For people like you to not be carrying a cell phone around it is just weird .
Inspector Midori: Ze Randomu Orudo Reedy Weze Hiavi Meekuappu-san ?
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: ... ! I- I dropped it somewhere .
Kaoko: Don’t lie! Inspector Midori, may you check her belongings .
Inspector Midori: Satou-kun !
Officer Sato (turns to Officer Takagi): Takagi-kun !
Officer Takagi (turns to Officer Chiba): Chiba-kun!
Officer Chiba: Hai !
Officer Sato: You do it *hits Takagi on the head*!
Inspector Midori: I told you do it *pinches Satou on her back*!
*they checked the random old lady with heavy makeup’s bag and found a cell phone covered in blood*
Inspector Midori: Why did you kill her?
The Random Old Lady With Heavy Makeup: She pisses me off.
*police takes her away*
Inspector Midori: Because of you, the case is solved!
Kaoko: It was nothing. Ohohohoho!
Inspector Midori: From now on… you are a member of the Investigation Bureau! And you are… Officer KAOKO!
Kaoko: Eh? Ehhhhh!!
Inspector Midori: Jaa na!
And that’s how I got the title 'Officer Kaoko' …